The not so brief story of rainbows, unicorns and New York City!

 

June 14, 2013 was the most magical day of my life. Kim Kardashian and Kanye West welcomed their illegitimate love child, North, into the world. It was also the day Luke proposed to me. One of the many reasons I love Luke is that he lives in the land of unicorns, rainbows, lollipops and puppies. Life is grand and everything is perfect and there is no reason to think otherwise, well until you fall in love with me. I wouldn’t say that I’m a total pessimist but maybe more of a realist but I definitely over analyze everything. However, on that day when he told me the most romantic things I’ve ever heard and placed the most magnificent rock of a ring on my hand I gladly took his hand and saddled up beside him on his unicorn. Our engagement set off a whirlwind year of events that had me at the highest highs of life is perfectness. Seriously, though, the year between our engagement and wedding was filled with nothing but champagne, presents, pretty dresses and endless amounts of love and support that we never saw coming. Presents started showing up at our doorstep in February and continued until long after our wedding in May. There were engagement parties, engagement pictures, bridals showers and bachelorette parties that all required extensive planning, shopping and pampering. Then there was wedding planning that was enjoyable for me because I knew exactly what I wanted and didn’t have to justify my thug to anyone, not even Luke. I just got what I wanted and it was glorious. Our wedding day was perfection. I got to marry my lobster in front of everyone we loved on a perfect Tucson day. Everything fell into place and everyone showed up to party. It was everything I pictured and more. Then to top it off, Luke and I ran off to a beach front villa in Mexico for a week to seal the deal. We came back from Mexico in the middle of June and by Luke’s birthday on the 24^th I was pregnant. Another thing I love about that man is his efficiency. Could life get any better? Could we ever come off this high? It wasn’t looking like it.

So obviously my personal life was at an all-time high but I also have a career on the side. A career that is demanding and relentless and redundant. Regardless, I’ve put a lot of time, energy and effort into being the best little number crunching CPA possible. Around the time my mom was getting lap dances from gay guys in Vegas at my bachelorette party I found out my company was being bought by a Fortune 500 publicly held company based out of California.  Going through a merger & acquisition is the March madness of accounting. You work your ass off in the early rounds and pray to make it beyond the sweet sixteen to gain all sorts of experience you would otherwise never gain on a day to day basis. The first round of due diligence lasted up until the wedding, I took two weeks off for wedding activities and was back in time for the second and final round of due diligence where you’re basically proving your company’s worth on a daily basis. In the end the shareholders get rich and you return to your much more complianced life as a number crunching nerd. But hey! You got experience for your resume so you’re indebted to the company that just worked you to the bone with no thank you for the last 6 months of your life. Oh and now you’re doing the work of an accounting department that’s usually 5 people deeper than your current department. The silver lining in all of this is that a lot of the work was being done out of New York and I have always dreamed of living and working in New York. I read an article in a magazine on a plane when I was a teenager about traders on Wall Street whose main job was to entertain clients by getting them high-end prostitutes and pure Columbian cocaine all in an effort to bring business to the firm. To me that sounded like a dream job, trade stocks by day and “entertain” by night. Then life happened. I was getting ready to put in for a transfer to New York when I was working for EY but I met Luke and he made me fall in love with him. My dreams changed a little when I all I could think about was locking him down and having his babies.

Our deal was announced on July 23^rd and I was scheduled to fly to New York on July 30^th for an operations meeting. My career dreams were coming true and I was so excited. I just had to make a quick stop by the doctor’s office for my first visit as a pregnant lady and then I was going to catch the red eye to New York that night. Luke and I were elated. We had names and cribs and everything picked out. We couldn’t contain our excitement and told our parents and brothers and sisters. My sister in law was 4 months along at the time and our babies were going to be only a few months apart, we were ecstatic. The doctor ran through the spiel and then I jumped up onto the bed to get the first peak of our baby. Then nothing. The doctor went from being talkative to silent and kept pressing harder and harder on my stomach. Nothing showed up on the screen. No heartbeat. No fetus. Nothing but a little egg yolk looking sack. When she teared up and grabbed my hand, I lost it. Luke was stunned and silent. We were beside ourselves. In a matter of seconds my world came crashing down. I had been thrown from my unicorn and was flailing on the ground gasping for air. It was the worst day of my entire life. To top it off, I had to call my boss and explain why I wouldn’t be meeting them at the airport. When she answered I couldn’t speak so I handed the phone to Luke. He began to talk and struggled to get the words out. We both burst into tears and had to send a text message to finish the conversation. I crawled into bed and didn’t ever want to leave. I had to call my mom and tell her the news and then my dad. Telling my dad was the worst, I could hear the pain in his voice and his helplessness that he couldn’t protect his little girl from this pain.  The doctor told me I could either wait for my body to “take care of it on its own” or I could expedite the process and take pills to facilitate everything. Nothing sounded worse to me than being pregnant but not really. I opted for the pills and then I waited. I waited for the doctor’s office to call and schedule me for the procedure. That weekend the doctor had 8 deliveries in 4 days and had no time for me. I found out about my circumstances on a Wednesday and had to wait until the following Tuesday to get in with the doctor. You don’t get special treatment at the doctor’s office when your pregnancy fails, you get to sit in the waiting room with perfectly plump pregnant ladies wondering what you did wrong and why their lives are so easy compared to yours. It’s torture. Luckily, the people I work with and for are wonderful. My boss told me to take as much time off as I needed and to let them know how they could help. Time off sounded wonderful considering how much I had been working, however, without work I had nothing to think about but my circumstances and that sucked even more than working 12 hour days. I went back to work the day after, closed my office door and worked for 6 hours straight. I didn’t talk to anyone or even make eye contact because I knew I wouldn’t be able to hold it together. Zoning out in excel and other people’s first world month end consolidation problems was the only alleviation from my personal problems.

Throwing myself into work was the only way I knew how to deal with it without actually dealing with anything. If I could work then I didn’t have to go to baby showers or celebrations of any sort. I didn’t want to make a scene at a friend’s party because I knew I would inevitably find myself in the bathroom crying and taking attention away from my friend.  Being unable to be happy for my friends brought on so much guilt. I couldn’t be a friend or a sister or a wife because nobody’s problems were as a big as mine and I had no sympathy for anyone else because all of their issues failed in comparison. I didn’t even tell my best friend about it until a month after it had happened because she just had a baby and I didn’t think she could relate to someone whose baby was taken from them. I resented her for her healthy child. So I just shut down. And worked.  I didn’t feel like talking about it helped. It felt like such a personal experience, my own problem that there was nothing to talk out or anyone to relate to. Luke was broken too but I couldn’t even validate his sadness because he wasn’t carrying our child, his body didn’t fail us. Lucky for me, he loved me regardless. He held me when I couldn’t hold it in anymore and he loved me more because of it. My sister in law had her baby shower about 3 months after our loss. It took every ounce of me to drive to Tucson to participate. I love my brother and Sydney more than anything in the world but there was nothing I wanted to do less than go to that baby shower. I couldn’t even drink my blues away at the shower because I had to freaking drive home. Toward the end of October my cousin and his wife gave birth to the first grandchild on the Prudence side. That weekend all the Prudences happened to be together at my house. We were hosting a pumpkin carving party and l took my brother to his first Eagles game. The morning of the game we all got the text message about Scotty. Everyone was ecstatic. I locked myself in my room and cried for an hour. I almost cancelled on the game. The guilt of not being able to be the person my loved ones were accustomed to almost weighed as heavily on me as the loss itself. It was horrible.

At the end of October we had completed our first year-end audit as a public company and it looked like things were going to finally slow down a little. The day after we filed with the SEC I found out I was pregnant. Again. I was not happy. I was terrified. I’m thankful Luke was still able to be excited. We swore each other to secrecy and promised we wouldn’t tell a soul until we were in the clear. I held my breath until our first appointment. For whatever reason, Luke and I drove separately to our appointment. I cried the entire way. I’m actually surprised I made it there. Luke had to pull me from my car and drag me to the office, I sobbed the whole time. I couldn’t go through that again, I wasn’t strong enough and couldn’t fathom how I would try to put myself back together if we got more bad news. The doctor didn’t even bother with the spiel, we went straight to the ultrasound. I closed my eyes and held my breath. There was silence again but not because there was nothing but because there were two. Two little peanuts at the size and heart rate to be expected at 9 weeks along. I exhaled for the first time in months.

I started my blog when everything came back clear at the 12 week appointment. I put aside healing from the miscarriage and channeled my energy into having a healthy twin pregnancy. I happily documented my journey on the blog but always felt a little guilty about the perfect picture I was putting out there. I started this post so many times but I couldn’t think through the right words to convey my feelings. I usually think about my posts while I’m driving to and from work and there were too many times I would cry the entire way thinking about writing this post. I probably just wasn’t ready.

I made the decision to go part-time after the boys arrived. I had been working my ass off through the merger and was honestly a little burnt out. I knew I couldn’t carry on at the rate I was going and still be the mother I planned on being. It was a really hard and bittersweet decision. We were finally getting the hang of operating as a public company and I knew there were projects in the works and opportunities to work in New York but with the boys pending arrival and my change to part-time I knew it wasn’t the right time for big career moves. I was so excited about the boys that I didn’t even think twice about the loss of my career.

The boys came and my life changed completely. Work wasn’t as important and I was happy for the balance I was getting by working only two days a week. The first 3 months of parenthood have their dark and scary moments for entirely different reasons but when I came out of that darkness I was the happiest I have ever been in my life. I settled into my routine and loved every second I was home with the boys but also found happiness in keeping a pulse in my career. Luke was home every night because he was working from the office and we found ourselves loving the simplicity and pace of raising babies. Naturally, I got a little bored. Not with my boys but with work. When I was struggling with figuring out how to be a mom I easily shut off any extra noise at work. I only did what I was assigned and didn’t take on more than my 20 hours a week could handle. But then I started to hear about and involving myself in issues we were having with another company our parent company purchased. We were tasked with their integration into public company madness and this little company had its entirely unique set of issues. Around that time Luke was getting the itch to get into the field and build something and got himself sent to Texas. At first, I was a little pissed but then I realized I was jealous. I was jealous of his adventure and that I was stuck at home. So my ears perked up a little more at work and that opportunistic side of me reared its pretty head.  On a whim I volunteered to go to NYC where the company is located and be the point person on the ground to help fully integrate them. My only condition was that I would be able to bring my boys with me and that I would be done around the time Luke finished in Texas. To my surprise, my boss was totally on board with the idea and pitched it to her boss. He thought I was crazy and said I could do the work from Scottsdale but I told him I wanted to be in NYC. He took the weekend to think about and told me to pack my bags on the following Monday!

From Luke to Texas to me to NYC was a matter of a week. Here I am sitting on a plane flying home from my second week in NYC and I can’t help but think I’ve come full circle. This Sunday my mom and boys will be flying to NYC where we’ll be living in an apartment in midtown Manhattan for the next couple of months while I work on the most exciting accounting project yet. Luke will fly to NYC from Texas on the weekends and we are going to get broke and fat exploring every square inch of the city. When the apartment I found was reminiscent of the brownstone Carrie Bradshaw lived in I couldn’t help but think the unicorn I fell from found me in Manhattan. I think I’m ready to hop back on.

….so that was written nearly two months ago and I am now wrapping up my time here in NYC. I cannot believe the experience we’ve had and I promise to blog about it all but I figured I should probably get this one posted first.

Liam the Lion Man and O-Bear rolled into town this Halloween and basically slayed it. I’d say our family won Halloween. Liam went as a lion, Owen as a bear, I went as a tiger and Luke was our zookeeper.

 

 

I definitely fell into the “new mom, first Halloween, over-priced costume trap” but how could I not? In order to get full use out of the boys’ costumes on Halloween morning I dressed them up in their costumes for our morning walk to the Henry to get coffee and breakfast. They received their requisite “ooohs” and “ahhs” and I just knew Halloween was going to be a success and Luke just knew I was on my way to being the mayor of crazy town.

Halloween night we had all of Luke’s family over for dinner and trick or treating. There are 7 grandkids aged 4 and under on his side so we were a little skeptical about how trick or treating would turn out. It would either be a sugar fueld never ending adventure or everyone would have complete meltdowns one house in. Luckily, everyone had a blast and our neighborhood was awesome for trick or treating. Hopefully, we can make it a tradition to get all of the cousins together for trick or treating!

 

Halloween also somewhat marks us living in our new house for a year, can you believe that? Last year, Luke and I were so excited for Halloween we sat on our front porch in our Adirondack chairs (standard arcadia sitting) waiting for over an hour for trick or treaters to show up. We had no idea when it would start but we definitely got a jump on happy hour and by the time people started showing up we were already two bottles of wine in! Then our neighbors started showing up and introducing themselves and I was basically loopy with full on wine lips. I make great first impressions. Fast forward a year and we have twins and our neighbors directly across the street from us have a baby boy, Camden, who was born a week after the twins – how cool is that? And it turns out Camden and his parents were tigers for Halloween so we had the cutest lion and tiger and bear (oh my) in Arcadia! We love our neighborhood so much. It is the perfect mix of young families and veterans who have lived on the street since the houses were built in the 1950’s. Everyone genuinely looks out for each other and are invested in bringing the community feeling to our little piece of Arcadia-peasant. So we’re not going anywhere anytime soon…well unless Luke gives me another set of twins and we simply run out of space!

 

The boys turned 5 months on 10/29 and are doing what they’re supposed to be doing according to those online progress checklists that could drive a mom crazy. They’re still working on holding their heads up 100% of the time but man it’s pretty exhausting. Especially for Owen who’s head is in the 90 percentile and the rest of his body in the 60^th. He’s so long, skinny and big headed that he kind of flails all over the place trying to do cool things with his body all the while Liam lays contently on the floor watching for the action to happen. Owen tries so many things that when something cool does happen he has no idea how he did it and can’t usually repeat the new cool trick ,but Liam who’s been watching, pulls the trick off with ease and then Owen is in amazement and usually passes out from exhaustion. I’ve really been trying to get them to engage in each other more but it’s hard because they are always haphazardly flinging body parts in every direction that when I get them too close to each other someone usually gets poked in the eye and then the world ends. However, I have gotten some pretty cute moments too where they lock eyes and babble to each other and I die of cuteness. So it’s all worth it in the end. Sometimes love hurts you know?

L+O: 4 Month Update

The Bug (Liam) and the Tug (Owen) are rocking and rolling and have changed so much in the last two months it’s crazy. It seems at my two month update the main things that changed were their weight and length and me coming out of the fog that is the first two months of parenthood but man in months 3 and 4 these little dudes are changing on a daily basis. And I have fallen even more in love with being a mom, specifically their mom.

At his 4 month checkup, Owen, weighed in at 14 pounds and was 26 inches long. Both of those measurements put him within normal percentiles on a full-term baby scale so the dude is doing his job. The Tug can light up an entire room with his smile which also takes over his entire face. Like Elf, smiling is his favorite and he will give anybody a smile and tell them his stories. He is still the chill little nugget of the two and will for the most part sit back and let Liam call the shots. However, we have come to experience what I call Omageddonn where in an instant his world ends and he has to tell the whole street about it. The boy can scream. The worst is in the middle of the night where I hear a blood curdling scream on the monitor and can hear it all the way from the nursery. I jolt straight up out of bed and haul ass to the nursery only to arrive to a sound asleep baby with the sweetest smile on his face. I look over and Liam is undisturbed and I’m left standing in the hall with Jak trying to get my heart rate to slow down. This happens at least once a week. You gotta wonder what a 4 month old dreams about to make him scream like that? Government ordered formula rations is the only thing I can think of.

Liam gets a gold star this month. He weighed in at 12 pounds and is 23 inches long which just barely puts him in the normal percentile limits so he’s still my little peanut for a little while longer. The weight and length changes are great but the biggest changes we have seen in him are in his disposition. Liam was a little pissed off the first two months of his life. You can’t blame him though, he spent his entire time in the womb being constantly kicked in the head by Owen and when he couldn’t take it anymore he decided to bust out 6 weeks early. At the time he probably thought that was the best decision but shortly after realized that the real world can sometimes suck.  Luke and I would worry about him because he was so rigid and uncomfortable. He also would consistently spit-up like the exorcist and we worried he wasn’t getting enough to eat. Slowly he started to keep food down and was able to eat more at each feeding and eventually was eating as much as the Tugboat. Then one day it seemed like a switch flipped and I woke up to the happiest baby on the planet. Liam was very selective in handing out smiles and telling stories but in the past few weeks he’s throwing them out there at a record setting pace which just warms my heart. His smile is the cutest too, it starts off as a little half smile like his dad, then spreads to his whole face and then bam you get hit with the cutest little dimples.

The boys are both talking up a storm and I love it! The best is when I go to get them in the morning from their nursery. Once they realize it’s me they both get the biggest smile on their face and just start blabbering non-stop. It’s crazy how much I miss them just from them going to bed at night and waking up in the morning. Am I a total mom or what? In the beginning, I would stress about the days I was I was home with them; I had no idea how I was going to pass the time and keep everyone alive, fed and happy. But now, I love my days home alone with them more than anything and love the routine we have fallen into. I still watch the clock for the time Luke is going to be home because I am just dying to tell him every single cute thing they do each day and he is so excited to hear about it. Luke and I went on a date a few weeks ago and we made it a whole 20 minutes before the only thing we could talk about were the boys. When I’m at work I try really hard to not talk about the boys non-stop and have set a rule for myself to not talk about the boys unless someone asks but I am dying inside waiting impatiently for someone to ask me so I can blabber on about them instead of working. At lunch (or every 15 minutes when I get bored) I watch the most recent videos of them on my phone over and over again. It’s insane. I haven’t been this obsessed with something since Luke and I started dating and before that the south beach diet. However, unlike the south beach diet, my obsession with all of my boys is sustainable!

Luke is doing great. He is still working from the office in town and is home every night to help me and kiss the boys goodnight. I can tell he is itching to get out in the field and build something but he is doing a good job being grateful for the opportunity to be home. Just this weekend, Luke, coined a new nickname for himself, Cuatro, because as he walked by the couch where Owen, Liam, Zeus and I were bunkered down waiting out the storm he realized (finally?) that he was fourth in line for my attention. At least he still has Jak who is definitely in last place since he keeps stealing and shredding the boys’ toys.

The last couple of weeks have been a little challenging for me because it was year-end at work and I also realized I was about 30 hours late on continuing education for my license. When I went back to work I planned on working 20 hours a week plus a few hours from home monitoring emails. The past four weeks I have worked nearly 30-40 hours each week getting in my training and helping out in the year-end crunch. I’m not gonna lie, the extra income has been great but the extra work to get the extra income has been taxing. The silver lining has been that I realized that I made the correct choice in coming back part time and really do enjoy being home with my boys and being able to keep our household somewhat together.

Oh! I almost forgot to mention and it’s the biggest change yet…THE BOYS ARE SLEEPING THROUGH THE NIGHT!! I probably should have opened with that line. When my mom left at the end of August, I was dreading asking Luke to help with the night feedings. I had so much guilt about asking for his help since he works full time but with my mom gone and me going back to work there was no way I could do all of the night feedings all of the time. Luke, of course, was on board and actually grew to liking his one on one time with the boys at midnight. I swear within one week of my mom being gone the boys were only up once at midnight and then at 4 as opposed to 8-10-12-2 while she was here and within two weeks of her being gone they were sleeping through the night.  I think we were so sleep deprived that without my mom there we just slept through their cries and inadvertently sleep trained them. Regardless, we feel like humans again and it is wonderful.

It should be no surprise to you that I think the boys are cuter in their Halloween costumes than the online models, hello motherly bias 🙂 We are looking forward to hosting Luke’s family at our home and taking all the kiddos trick-or-treating in our neighborhood.  Hopefully, I can get a Halloween post up before Christmas but no promises!

Oh snap it’s already been two months since the nuggets got here and who knows where the time has gone? Maternity leave came and went, the boys have doubled in size and I got absolutely nothing done that I had planned but we survived and that’s all that really matters.

While I was pregnant a lot of people gave me the advice to take tons of pictures because they change so quickly. I made a mental note to schedule a newborn shoot but didn’t get around to it until they were two months old, however, I justify this because their adjusted age at the time of the shoot was really 3 weeks old so I’m technically on top of it! We found our photographer through some friends and were excited to use her as she has twin boys of her own. The morning of the shoot Luke and I realized we were down to our last 4 bottles worth of formula and decided we would run to Costco after the shoot to restock. Of course, the boys went on a feeding spree that day and by the time the photographer arrived we were rationing off ounces of formula to get them through the shoot somewhat peacefully. The goal of the shoot was to get pictures of the boys separately, together, and of all four of us as a big happy family. Two hours into our two hour session we had barely gotten any pictures of the boys separately.

Owen, our laid back dude, of course slept peacefully through his individual shoot and the photographer was able to toss him around and get all of his shots in a few minutes

Liam, our alert inquisitive little colonel in the making, didn’t sleep a wink the entire time. He was very concerned about what was going on and fascinated by the camera. We didn’t get a single shot of Liam sleeping peacefully but the pictures we did get perfectly captured his essence

Then we attempted the impossible: a photo of the two of them together sleeping like babies, but what actually transpired was Liam trying to eat Owen’s face and Owen locking in on the camera lens and refusing to look away

At this point we were three hours in, the boys hadn’t slept a wink, we still hadn’t attempted a family shot and the boys were getting hungry. Cue baby strait jackets (swaddles) and we all hopped into our bed to attempt a family photo.

As the photographer left I felt really disappointed in the experience. Not because of her and her abilities (she’s the best) but because I imagined pinterest perfect shots and could not fathom one decent picture coming out of our session since the boys seemed so uncooperative. I felt bad for my bank account and bad for the photographer who was going to have to make a miracle from a cow pie. The pictures we received a week later were PERFECT.  Nobody is going to sign the boys on as gerber babies based on this performance but Nicole perfectly captured our family in its current state of chaos and I can’t help but smile every time I look at the pictures.

At two months old the boys are starting to develop personalities and are evolving from blobs to happy little babies. Since they’re twins it seems everyone wants to talk about how similar they are (duh), but Luke and I are amazed about how different they actually are. Owen is a pretty laid back go with the flow little dude. He doesn’t miss a meal and is only unhappy when he thinks he might get surpassed on his next feeding. He sleeps, he eats and he goes back to sleep. He’s generally content and will give smiles to anyone that might give him a bottle. He’s our little tugboat. Then there’s Liam, who is a little more uptight and very aware. He’s concerned with every aspect of his day and makes you work for every smile but every smile is definitely worth it. He’s also discovered his reflection and is pretty impressed with the results. Liam discovered the power of his cry. He figured out that crying is a call to action and he uses it wisely. He knows we will eventually rock him to sleep if he cries long enough and if he pitches a real fit there’s a 100% he will get out of tummy time. He’s my little LiLi Bug and is definitely not going to love that nickname when he’s 15!

Luke and I are surviving as well. Actually I would say Luke is thriving and I am surviving. Seeing Luke with the boys and the love and patience he has for them definitely makes me forgive him for putting twins in me in the first place. During my pregnancy I kept reading about this overwhelming sense of love all these moms seemed to experience from the minute their babies were placed in their arms. The only overwhelming feelings I had in the beginning were the need to fall asleep for a week straight and then wake up and revaluate my life decisions. I felt guilty for feeling this way, was stressed out about being a bad mom and thought my boys deserved better. But as time has gone on, I’ve started to get more rest and confidence in my mothering abilities and I am happy to report that the overwhelming feelings of love have crept in and are not going anywhere.  I love being parents with Luke to these boys….but don’t quote me on that I may change my mind a year from now when they’re walking around destroying my house.

p.s. If you live in the Phoenix area and are looking for a photographer check out Nicole with Barndoor photography and let her know we sent you her way!

I was planning on taking the week off leading up to my scheduled c-section on June 26^th in order to relax, nest, un-wind from work mode Erin and mentally prepare for mom mode Erin. I told Luke one night, “I hope I can take PTO the week leading up to the c-section, it would totally suck to find myself working until 8:00 pm on Thursday and go in at 5:00 am Friday to have my babies…” Part of the relaxing was going to be catching up on my blog. Don’t tell my boss but I usually write my blog posts on my lunch break and then finalize at home by uploading pictures and formatting. In the middle of May my replacement at work started (yes! I’m going to go back to work part-time) and we decided to share my office to maximize training opportunity. While my overall work related production increased exponentially my poor little blog fell behind.

Then on May 28^th I found myself at work at 7:30 pm on a Thursday night walking through the month-end close process with our new staff. Earlier that afternoon I had a bio-physical ultrasound, non-stress test and growth checks for the twins. They passed with flying colors – both boys were growing at the rate of half a pound per week, their heart beats were within expected limits, and we could tell they were practicing their breathing and moving during the ultrasound. They still had some growing left to do but I left there a proud momma and told the boys they just had to hold out until Grandma Prudence got into town in the middle of June then they could come whenever they wanted. I picked up dinner on my way home and sat grumpily on the couch bitching to Luke about having to work late. He, of course, isn’t a fan of me working late and being stressed out but he also knows that there’s no telling me what to do so he sat there nodding in agreement while zoning out watching Despicable Me. I hate animated movies unless I’m watching with a kid but I didn’t say anything and he didn’t voluntarily change the channel so we sat in silence knowing that if either one of us spoke that we would bicker and wind up in a petty fight. Finally, the movie ended and we called it a night. Luke takes about 30 seconds to get ready for bed. Somewhere between the living room and bedroom he strips down to his boxers and is in bed in no time but I have my entire routine to go through – a routine that doubled in time over the course of pregnancy because I have to pee at least 5 times before crawling into bed. For some reason right before bed I freak out about having to wake up so many times during the night so I try to go as many times before climbing into bed as possible.  Zeus and Luke lay in bed staring at me in the bathroom begging me with their eyes to hurry up and get in bed so the lights will go off. Right as I put one leg into bed I felt the pressure on my bladder to pee so I stepped back down and boom! my water broke and splashed all over the floor. Both Zeus and Luke sat straight up and saw the terrified look in my eyes. I told Luke I either peed my pants or my water broke and that I couldn’t tell either way, but I do know that no matter the amount of kegels I did there was no stopping the flow of water out of me. We decided it would be best to go to the hospital to be safe but in my gut I knew it was go time. Luke went into panic mode and I stayed relatively calm. I decided that we should pack a bag in case it ended up being the real deal and rattled off a mile long list of things Luke needed to do before we left. Install car seats, wash baby clothes, charge camera, groom dogs and remodel kitchen were all on there and Luke did his best to placate me but about five minutes later he gave me the “get your ass in the car before something happens and you have my babies on the side of the street…” look so I obliged. Our hospital bag ended up containing about five days worth of clothes for each season but no underwear, toiletries, or anything for the boys. Thankfully we live close to the hospital.

I called the afterhours emergency line for my doctor’s office and a lady said, “thanks for calling we’ll have someone call you back within an hour.” I was confused because I thought something labeled “emergency line” would equate to quick action. Apparently not. The lady tried to get off the phone with me but I wasn’t having it. I asked if I should go to the hospital or just hang out until someone decided to call. She said, “I am not qualified to give advice, I can only pass your message along to the on-call doctor.” In normal circumstances this would be a perfectly acceptable response to me, I would understand the liability involved in having a non-qualified person giving out medical advice, however, normal me had left the building an hour prior. She tried to get off the line again but before she could I blurted out, “ma’am, I have a waterfall between my legs, I’m only 34 weeks with twins and my husband and I have no idea what’s going on because these are our first kids…” She said, “girl as mother myself you are in labor, get your ass to the hospital.” Alrighty then. By the time the phone call ended we were already at the hospital. It was late so we had to use the afterhour’s entrance and were directed to the admitting desk in the lobby. Luckily, the girl on duty was someone we had been dealing with regularly when going to the hospital for non-stress tests. She did a double take and asked, “You’re doing a non-stress test this late?” I told her it was the real deal and she was shocked. She started to register me in the system as an inpatient when I had to tell her, “I’m sorry but I’m about to leak all over your lobby, is there any way we can expedite this process?” Within a minute she had me in a bed on the labor floor and said she would finish the paperwork herself and bring to me to sign. Lobby flood avoided.

Nonchalant would be the understatement of the century when it came to the nurses’ response time to what Luke and I thought was the most important event in the world at the moment. They wandered in and out of our room taking my vitals and getting me situated. As ,Rachel, the RN Supervisor on duty listened to my lungs I asked her what the process was going to be. She said they first had to determine if my water actually broke then they would determine the steps to be taken from there. I asked her, “I have completely soaked this puppy pad you have me lying on, is there any chance my water didn’t break?” She spread my legs, felt the puppy pad and replied, “Oh you’re right! Ok you’re going to be a full admit, get comfortable.” She then fisted me to check my cervix and I was already 4 cm dilated. She got a little pep in her step and everyone we dealt with from there on out had a sense of urgency. Rachel returned with another nurse, Jessie, and explained Jessie would be by my side every step of the way and that Rachel would be rotating between patients but would be in the room with us for important events. Then they started draw blood and hook me up to the IV. The sight of blood and needles makes me pass out so I turned my head and closed my eyes to avoid unnecessary medical attention. I could feel the blood being drawn when I heard a clink on the ground and Jessie said, “man, I’m a bad shot.” I told her that was probably not something she should say as she was sticking needles in someone and Rachel and her died laughing. They got it together and got the IV in me and then Jessie started running through a list of a million questions that she had to ask. About halfway through the list I looked down at my wrist where the IV was and it had swollen to almost double in size from my wrist bone halfway up my forearm. I interrupted Jessie, showed her my arm and asked if this was a normal. She said, “oh shit! I must have blown a vein.” She tried one more time on my right arm and two more times on my left arm before calling Rachel in to get the IV inserted correctly. This is going to be a shit show I thought to myself, but I had nowhere else to go. Rachel then explained that she had heard from Dr. Hunt, the on-call doctor, and that Dr. Hunt instructed her to put me on magnesium to delay labor. The doctor wanted to try to delay labor long enough to inject me with steroids that would help develop the boys lungs. Once injected, the steroids would need 48 hours to have an impact so the goal was to delay labor for at least 2 entire days but longer if possible so a second dose of steroids could be injected. I asked if I was going to just be sitting around for the next 4 days before anything was going to happen and Rachel said, “yep, that’s the goal. Get comfortable, “ as she handed me the remote to the TV in the room. The room emptied and it was just Luke and I in complete disbelief. Purposely delaying labor and sitting around a hospital room sounded like the worst way to spend a week ever but we knew the doctor had our boys best intentions in mind so we settled in and decided to watch a movie to pass the time. For whatever reason I chose to watch Jersey Boys and Luke didn’t even object. Since we had a plan, we decided it was time to call our parents. Up to this point, I had kept it together pretty well. I was freaking out inside but did my best to keep it calm, cool and collected on the outside. The minute I heard my mom’s voice on the phone I broke down and started to bawl while the song “Big girls don’t cry” played in the background. Jersey Boys was providing the soundtrack to my labor.  All I could mutter was “my water broke and they’re trying to delay labor for a few days.” My mom responded, “ok so you’ll have the babies in two weeks then?” I didn’t know if I misspoke or my mom misinterpreted but I couldn’t deal so I threw the phone to Luke and at that time the room filled with people again to administer the steroids. I looked over and Luke was explaining the process to my mom but as soon as saw the fear in my eyes he basically hung up on her. My poor mom, I can’t imagine getting that call half way across the world and it ending not knowing how I was actually doing or what was actually going on – sorry mom! The nurses and medical student in the room kept warning me about how painful the stinging from steroid shot was going to be and I was freaking out. I rolled onto my side and grabbed Luke’s hand with a death grip. A few minutes later I asked when the shot was going to be administered and was told it had already happened. I didn’t feel a thing. This is one time my big booty came in handy!

After the steroids were injected things became a blur and started to move quickly or at least it was quick to me. I started to feel my contractions and the nurses would pop into the room to have me rate the pain on the scale of 1 -10. 1 equated to manageable, 5 equated to having to cry through them, and 10 equated to someone chopping your leg off and smacking you in the face with it. I hovered around a two for awhile but escalated to a 5 within two hours. The entire time various doctors and nurses would come into the room and try to have serious conversations with me and I would have to interrupt to cry through a contraction. I even had an ultrasound performed by a tech who didn’t seem to care I was contracting and would push on my belly to get the perfect angle; I have never seriously contemplated killing someone until that moment. After crying through enough contractions and the contractions getting closer and closer together the nurse checked my cervix again. She reported that I was 6 cm dilated. She looked Luke and I in the eyes and said, “things are going to start moving quickly.” “How quickly,” asked Luke. “Your babies will be here within an hour, our policy is 1 hour from decision to incision.” Holy-freaking-sh!t. I was relieved. I knew in my gut this would be the result so I just wanted to get there. Luke called our parents to let them know what was going on and he successfully calmed my mom down a little bit, or at least I think. My original plan was to have Luke, my mom and my mother in law Lana at the hospital with me for my scheduled c-section. I figured one person per baby and one person to watch me. I was two people short of my plan and told Luke to call my brother and tell him to get up to Phoenix immediately. Luke and the nurse explained to me that I would be in the operating room within the next 30 minutes and that my brother would not have enough time to get there. I was unraveling at the seams. Knowing that we had so much family and help near us is what kept me somewhat sane during the pregnancy. Now it was just us to tackle the biggest moment of our life. The neonatologist came into the room to set expectations for the boys’ conditions and the steps that would be taken. He said since the boys were so early the expectation would be that they would need a fair amount of support when they arrived, anything from heat to breathing support. Dr. Hunt then came in to explain the c-section procedure and finally the nurse came in to wheel me down to the operating room.  Poor Luke had to stay back in the room while the surgical team prepped. We were reassured we would only be separated for thirty minutes but it felt like thirty hours.

My surgical team was amazing and at no point did I feel unsafe or unsure but I still thought the entire process was bizarre. I was so relieved when Luke walked into the room and took a seat next to me to hold my hand. We locked eyes and I said, “I don’t think you want to look.” He had been contemplating it but was completely overwhelmed when he got into the room and immediately agreed looking was not the best idea. Then the team got to work. To us, it was the most terrifying moment of our lives. I was being sawed open and we didn’t know if our boys would be ok when they came out, but to the team it was just another Friday morning standard procedure. They chatted the entire time and talked about a YouTube video they had recently seen all while tossing me around, tearing me open and digging through my insides to get to my babies. I could feel them moving me but I couldn’t feel pain which is the weirdest feeling ever. Luke and I were so terrified all we could do was look at each other. Finally, the doctor said, “here’s baby A,” and it was the longest 5 seconds of our lives before we heard him cry. They brought Liam around the sheet to show us. I’m not going to lie but he looked like a purpley-grey slimy alien – but to me he was absolute perfection. Shortly after the doctor told us baby B was on his way out and again we held our breath until we heard him cry. Another purpley blob named Owen was presented to us and then I began to sob uncontrollably. I felt like I had been holding my breath for the past 8 months and could finally breathe knowing they were here and were ok. I was also shaking uncontrollably from the cold room and pain medication so basically I was a hot mess. Everyone kept asking if I was ok and all I could do was nod and mumble, “I’m just happy”. The nurse grabbed Luke to cut the umbilical cords and I was left shaking and crying on the table while the doctors finished the procedure. Luke returned to my side and the neonatologist brought each baby to me all clean and swaddled up. They plopped the babies on my chest and I was finally able to detail inspect each kid. As I suspected they were still perfect. As quickly as they were presented to me they were ushered away to the nursery. I sent Luke to stand guard and I was wheeled into triage to recover. The neonatologist eventually came into triage to update me on the boys. He told me they were perfect, tell me something I don’t know I thought to myself. But really, he said that the expectation for the twins coming so early was that they would need a lot of support – oxygen, heat, feeding, and possibly more at a higher level than the hospital was able to provide. To everyone’s surprise they only needed feeding support and would be able to stay on-site at our hospital. I had set the expectations that if they came early we could count on a stay in the NICU so it wasn’t a surprise when I was told they would be staying there rather than in my recovery room with Luke and I. On my way up to recovery I was wheeled through the nursery and was able to see them again in all their cleaned up glory. They were beautiful and I was exhausted. I was wheeled up stairs to our recovery room but found myself relieved and grateful that the boys would be monitored around the clock by the NICU nurses. We settled into our room and were instructed by the nurses to rest which we happily followed. Before drifting off to sleep I looked at Luke and smiled, we were parents.

During my pregnancy I never understood every mother’s insistence on telling me their birth stories in detail, frankly, it became annoying. I mean it’s all basically the same; your water breaks, you go to the hospital, something unexpected happens, you are in the most incredible pain of your life and finally your babies show up. Wash, rinse, repeat for every other woman on earth. BUT now I totally understand. The boys’ birth was the most terrifying, painful and rewarding 8 hours of my life and I hope to remember every detail of the process for ever. So I apologize to every woman who told me their birth story while I was rolling my eyes on the inside and figuring out how to exit our conversation.

After experiencing birth first hand, I can say with confidence that females are unbreakable and strong as hell! 

Now that you have read the novel that is my recollection of the twins’ birth you shall be rewarded with some pictures of Liam and Owen and their journey into our lives!

 

Meeting the boys for the first time. Liam Richard Leonard was born first at 2:35 AM on Friday May 29, 2014. Liam weighed 3 pounds 12 ounces and was 17.5 inches long. Owen Prudence Leonard was born shortly after at 2:36 AM. Owen weighed 4 pounds 13 ounces and was 19 inches long.

 

After meeting Luke and I the boys were whisked off to the NICU for a detail inspection. The pictures above perfectly represent the boys personalities so far. Liam, on the left, is such a little boss. He was the one who got the party started by attempting to make his way out. He has been alert and communicative since the minute he was born. Owen, on the right, would have been happy hanging out under my rib cage for another month or two. He’s fat, happy and laid back but once Liam decides to take action he’s on board. Can’t wait to see how their personalities develop!

WE. ARE. PARENTS.

***Please disregard my face. It is roughly the size face of a 300 pound person but I was extremely bloated from all of the drugs being pumped through my body. However, this is our first family picture so I had to include.

Pure sweet perfection. Liam and Owen have turned our lives upside in the most amazing way possible. I can’t believe they have been with us for a month already! Hopefully, I can get some more pictures and dialogue up about our journey so far, but seeing as their birth story took a month for me to produce I wouldn’t hold your breath.

Yikes! I have been slacking when it comes to my blog. I have so many posts I want to do yet it feels like I have so little time. Maybe it’s because I have regressed from the second trimester and all I want to do in my free time is sleep. Or maybe it’s because for some reason I’ve gotten super busy at work and haven’t had time to write my posts during the day lunch. My plan at work was to coast until the babies got here but apparently I’m the only one on board with my plan. I’ve been dreaming of prescribed bed rest so I can leave work in the dust and focus on the blog, Netflix, and a few good books but I think my boss would still find a way for me to work from bed! I should also be grateful that I don’t HAVE to be on bed rest which means I’m still doing good as far as the baby cooking is concerned.

Last week, Zeus and Jack, went up to Page for the week with Luke. They had the best time ever. Luke was diligent about taking them on adventures every day and they were pooped each night. I was kind of looking forward to having a week completely to myself but by Tuesday I was face-timing Luke while sobbing because I missed my boys so much (Luke included). The original plan was for me to join the boys in Page for the weekend and then bring the dogs back with me Monday morning but the entire week leading up to the Page adventure I kept dreaming about having to stop for gas on the reservation and having some psycho cut my babies out of me (crazy, right?). Luke could tell I was stressed about driving all that way by myself so we vetoed the trip. What is happening to me? Am I a wuss or are my maternal-worry-about-everything instincts kicking in? That is to be determined, but here as some pictures from the boys’ adventures in Page:

This week, Luke took Jack to Page and left Zeus for me. Jack is the happiest pup on the face of the planet. He has Luke all to himself for the week and doesn’t have his little monkey Zeus hanging on him at all times. It’s probably a great thing for Jack to get some quality time with Luke before the boys come so I’m glad it worked out. On the other hand, I love having Zeus all to myself. Since there are no other options for his attention, by default I have become his favorite. He has been such a sweet boy and follows me around the house wherever I go and sits on my heel whenever I’m standing. I love it!

Jack and Luke are very active together:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Luke even took up repelling with some of the guys he’s working with. They repel off the bridges they build and explore all over the area.

 

 

While Zeus and I take a much less active approach to our weeks together:

 

This weekend we’ll be heading to Tucson for the last time before the twins arrival, can you believe that?? I’m not allowed out of Maricopa county starting next week. My Aunt Karen who lives in New Hampshire is visiting. I haven’t seen her since this time last year when I was getting married and now here I am knocked up with twins! What a difference a year makes eh? My brother is going to have everyone over at his house and we are just going to hang out by the pool and get down on some Eegees! I am going to attempt to make this, but my penchant for taking 3 hours naps at any moment may prevent this from actually happening.

I hope everyone has a great weekend and I quasi promise to get a bump update and a freaking Hawaii post up soon.

Now that I’m huge and obviously pregnant the general public takes that as a free pass to ask me about my pregnancy. 99% of people ask me “how do you feel?” I feel normal and not a whole lot different than when I wasn’t growing twins. When I tell people that they usually look really disappointed. Do they want me to be feeling horrible? Am I supposed to be feeling out of this world? I don’t know what they expect me to say but I do know that I am lucky to have had such an uneventful pregnancy so far and that a lot of women go through hell. What I really want people to ask me is “so what do you think of pregnancy?” That question, depending on the time of day and how much of it I have spent pondering the bizarre process of pro-creation could yield any number of responses. The topics I have been pondering lately are as follows:

**some of the below might be a little graphic or gross or just too much information in general so read at your own risk**

Occupational Therapy

I didn’t know becoming an occupational therapist was a legitimate career choice until I was in my junior year of college and overheard a few of the other athletes in the training room discussing getting their masters degree in occupational therapy after they completed their undergrad. I was eavesdropping so I didn’t ask for details but I still had no clue what an occupational therapist actually did. I concluded that an occupational therapist probably provided counsel to those who chose to obtain degrees in fields of study that had no promising jobs in the real world. I was surprised you would need a masters to tell somebody they made a poor life decision and would probably need to obtain another degree or additional training to get a job that would pay off the loans on their original degree.

Eventually I learned what occupational therapy really was but still didn’t grasp its importance because it didn’t relate to me as I was still young, healthy and in reasonably good shape. Eventually when I started to pay attention to people besides myself I realized how useful and necessary this type of therapy is; I have a friend who provides occupational therapy to children with disabilities and my grandparents have received therapy when they’ve undergone surgery and would have to use a walker or other type of assistance while they recovered.

Then one day shortly after my belly officially popped and I could no longer see my feet I found myself in quite the predicament in the restroom at work. When I went to wipe, my arms couldn’t reach any of the areas in need. I panicked. Did my arms become shorter? Did I have T-Rex syndrome?

Nope. My arms couldn’t reach around my stupid belly. 29 years of doing things the same way and I could not for the life of me think of an alternate way to accomplish this task. Finally, I stood up, did the old reach around and got the job finished. There had to be a better way though, would I really have to stand to clean myself the rest of this pregnancy? Later that night, probably over dinner, I asked Luke, “Babe, how do you wipe your butt?” These types of questions should not surprise him by now but this one made him choke on his food. He said nothing. I went on to explain my predicament and finally he replied, “from the back, duh.” Finally some clarity. Over the next few weeks as my belly got bigger I had to re-learn how to do many tasks I never had to think twice about before such as tying my shoes, getting out of bed, shaving body parts that I cannot see or reach in a safe manner, walking around corners, safely securing my boobs, picking something up off the ground, and many other mundane tasks I previously overlooked. Then it got me thinking of all the things I would have to figure out how to do with 2 babies such as leaving the house, going to the grocery store where carts only have slots for one nugget, picking two kids up at once, nursing two kids, loving two kids simultaneously and then my mind basically exploded.

Moral of this story is that I came to the conclusion that there should be occupational therapy for pregnant ladies and new moms. Is there such a thing?

Slinging a Jay

Growing up, every summer my family would go to our family reunion at my great uncle’s lake house in Lake Elsinore, California and then spend the week after at the beach in Carlsbad, California. We could walk from our hotel to the town center and often went to a restaurant called Jay’s. I think it was a casual pizza / Italian place. One night as we left the restaurant after dinner my dinner immediately didn’t agree with me and I spent the next 30 minutes testing the plumbing in the bathroom. When I finally walked out to the parking lot to join my family only my cousins (all male) and brother were left waiting for me. The entire way home they made fun of me and my bowel movements and teased that we would probably get billed for repairs to the bathroom. For the rest of the week, every time I would get up to leave the room my cousin Ryan would say something to the extent of “where you going Erin, To drop a Jay…?” and of course everyone would laugh. In fact, over ten years later everyone is still laughing about it.

Ten years after that incident we all found ourselves in St. Louis for my oldest cousin, Sean’s, wedding. By that time we were all drinking age and after a night of partying together with the cousins and uncles my cousin Ryan (see a theme here) took us to a late night diner and insisted we all order the St. Louis Slinger which was some sort of rice, gravy loco-moco type dish. At the time it was delicious but when the 8 of us got back to the hotel at 2 in the morning it affected all of us in the same way Jay’s had effected me. 8 people and 2 bathrooms made for a long smelly night. Naturally, we combined the two incidents and now when anyone in my family has to poop we fondly refer to the process as “slinging a jay.”

Early on in my pregnancy my sister in law was still pregnant and I constantly asked my brother every detail about her experience. One day I asked him, “What is Syd most looking forward to after Harrison?” I was expecting a textbook response like wine, sushi, skinny jeans or seeing her feet but his response was, “slinging a solid jay.” What???? I had no idea my ability to sling jays on the regular was going to be compromised? Never in my life did I have to wish for solid jay slinging, us Prudence kids were proud to be regular. I just couldn’t believe that something else could be stolen from me during pregnancy. I felt like everything good in life was being taken away from me.

From that day on, every time I sling a solid jay I thank the powers above and wonder if that was my last good jay until further notice. Pregnancy has really made me appreciate the little things in life.

The Skinny Getting Skinnier

There’s no way around it or me, I am getting fat. Yes, most of it is in my belly but everything else is getting big too. Before we left for Hawaii, I went to pack this panama hat Luke bought me last year and thought to myself to try it on first. Nope, didn’t fit. Even my damn head is getting bigger (most people thought that wasn’t possible). My butt is getting bigger to counter balance my belly. My fingers and toes swell when I don’t drink enough water or I consume too much salt. My boobs are getting bigger to accommodate the dietary needs of the twins when they get here. Everything is getting bigger. AND I STILL HAVE 3 MONTHS LEFT.

As I get bigger, everyone else is getting skinnier. They swear to me that they are the same size but all my girlfriends and especially my sister in laws who all just had kids are shrinking. When I was a normal sized person everyone else seemed normal and something drastic would have to occur for me to wonder, “WTF happened to so and so?” I wish everyone would stop shrinking, I can’t tell if I’m delusional or need to start staging interventions and share my fries! Will my circus mirror mind re-adjust after the boys get here?

So that’s what I think about. Sadly, it’s only the tip of the iceberg into my thoughts but this post started to run long. As long as I don’t get any scathing reviews from my loved ones I’ll share more of a look into my questionable thought process in another post. I should probably think about how to care for a newborn or what my birth plan is going to be but my mind runs off on all these wild tangents and then it’s five o’clock and time to go home. After reading this post it is perfectly understandable if you question whether or not I’m fit to be a parent, I’m sure Luke is. I hope you also understand why there weren’t any accompanying pictures.

Happy pooping, people!

 

Growing up, for every occasion I thought that I should be receiving a gift, I would make a detailed list and distribute it accordingly. This habit started when I was really little and noticed that the Toys’R’Us catalog was included in the Sunday paper. As my parents would read the paper I would scour the catalog, circle everything I wanted, write a summary list and even include tax at the bottom to calculate a grand total of the items I was expecting! Then when the internet age rolled in and online shopping was introduced I would make Santa a word document with links to the exact items I wanted from sites all over the internet to make Santa’s job a little easier. I was always disappointed when I received something that wasn’t on the list or not to the exact specifications that I outlined. I mean I went through all the trouble to tell you exactly what I wanted, how hard is it to comply? My poor mom.

When I started dating Luke I attempted to employ the same process and he was not having it. My thought process was that if I outlined exactly what I want and he stuck to the outline, then we avoid me being disappointed. He, however, is the king of surprises whether you want them or not. He didn’t have many serious relationships before me so it was like he had 10 years of surprises built up just for me and it really stressed me out! But he loved it. I would send him links to things I liked and 100% of the time I would not receive them. One day I asked him why he never got me anything I actually wanted and he replied, “You do realize I am never going to get you something you tell me you want, I’m going to find something you never realized you wanted until I give it to you!” I was blown away, this entire time I had been sabotaging myself…and I also found it kind of romantic that he put that much thought into anything. In the end, though, I took his response as a challenge and have been playing mind ninja ever since to plant ideas in his head and make them think they are his own so that I still get what I want. That my friends is the key to marriage!

So it pains me to put a list out there of things I want for my birthday because I know Luke will read this and then I won’t get anything on the list…or will I?

1: Tom Ford Sunglasses: I’m turning 30, so I think it’s about time I get a little Tom Ford in my life. I’ve been dying for a pair of his sunglasses for quite some time now but haven’t been able to pull the trigger.

4: Urban Outfitters Vanity: I have the perfect space in our master bedroom for this vanity. Our furniture is white and I was thinking I would have to go white for a vanity but I am loving this goldish-bronzy color and am thinking I might need to find a bedside table in the same finish for the hubby boo’s side of the bed.

3 Madewell Slides: It’s about that time folks. The time where I cannot bend over to secure any straps on sandals and my feet are getting squishy. I need a pair of slides that I can wear to work and slip on without the assistance of the husband. I’d like these in black!

2: Kate Spade Tote: This is perfect for summer! It has pool / beach / outside all day written all over it and I think I could carry one of the twins around in there if I had to.

**see what I did there with the numbering? Actually, I just couldn’t copy / paste into the correct order without losing the hyperlink (you know in case someone actually followed my direct links to things I want).

The good news is that there’s still a month and a day left until my birthday so there is plenty of time for you to buy me something and plenty of time for me to mind ninja Luke!

 

While mom and dad were away in Hawaii Jak & Zeus went to play at the cabin with Grandma and Grandpa Leonard. Their week started off like this:

And then after a full week of walks, quad rides, playing with the new puppy and being mountain men, Zeus & Jak’s week ended like this:

Looks like they need a vacation from their vacation.

Right before we left for Maui we learned Luke would be sent out of town for work starting the Monday we got back. He was sent up to Page to help build a round about in the middle of town. He’ll be there until the boys get here and then he’ll be working from the office so he can be on daddy duty too. I’m betting he’ll be asking to get sent back to Page after a week of all-nighters with the boys. Luke has opted to go all out budget conscious and live in his parents 5th wheel while he’s there. He found a RV park right on Lake Powell and the set up looks pretty sweet. I’m hoping my doctor will let me travel up there for a weekend soon!

Now the furry boys sit and stare at me all the time wondering where their fun parent is:

It’s been weird not having Luke around during the week. Even though he spent the first two years of our relationship on the road so much has changed since then! I don’t like sleeping by myself at night but I do  like making all the TV decisions! Jak is a sad sack when Luke is not around. He carries one of his slippers around the house and sleeps on it. Zeus on the other hand is the opposite of a loyal companion – he happily takes up all of Luke’s spot on the bed and doesn’t realize someone is missing until Luke walks through the door. Then he’s like “oh yeah, I like this guy.” Let me lick your face.

So this week has been a transition week getting used to our new schedules and sleep patterns, but I’m sure we’ll get all adjusted just in time for twins arrival and subsequent implosion of normalcy!

Whoa! It’s been a while since I last posted so I’m coming back with the good stuff – belly pictures. I haven’t posted for so long because Luke and I went on our babymoon to Hawaii and there is no way I was getting anywhere near a computer while I was there. I hope all will be forgiven with the bump pictures and a Hawaii post to follow soon!

21 Weeks: There is nothing more glorious to this pregnant woman than finding a non-maternity dress in her closet that still fits. This moment had to be documented.

22 Weeks: Happy St. Fatty’s day! I decided to get into the holiday spirit and since I couldn’t get wasted in normal St Patty’s fashion I wore a green cardigan and made corned beef and cabbage. Luke came home at lunch time “to check on the corned beef” and ended up eating 1/2 of it but that’s ok because I was mostly concerned about the potatoes! I for sure got potato wasted.

23 Weeks: Luke and I decided to go on a fancy date night to Mastro’s Steak House so I forced myself to put on a dress and makeup and was actually pleasantly surprised with the results! Mastro’s is a pregnant girl’s dream, sure they have great steaks but what really spoke to my heart were the lobster mashed potatoes and butter cake. When the waiter found out I was having twin boys he comped the butter cake, looked me and the eyes and sincerely wished me good luck.

24 Weeks: Hello Maui! I am not a trendy person but I definitely got on board with the babymoon trend especially since it warranted a trip to Maui. A babymoon is a last vacation a couple takes before the baby arrives. The idea is to spend time together to rest and remember why you liked each other enough to create babies before said babies turn your world upside down. Luke told me the guys at work were perplexed by the term “babymoon.” I like to picture a bunch of construction workers standing around in hard hats, fluorescent safety vests and steel toe boots discussing the concept of babymoons! Anyways, ours was amazing and exactly what the doctor ordered but it would not have been possible without the generosity of My Uncle Billy and Aunt Cris. I promise a jealousy inducing post on Hawaii is coming shortly!

25 Weeks: You can’t call a trip to Maui complete without having a meal at Mamma’s Fish House in Paia. It is hands down my favorite restaurant and inspires me to figure out how to get rich quick so on my next trip to Maui every single one of my meals can be here. We ate at Momma’s on our last night so as to not set the bar too high for the rest of the meals we had. It did not disappoint!

In summary, after careful review of all pictures in this post, I am happy to report that my gut finally sticks out further than my butt! Once we get the boobs on board with the growth plan my proportions will be entirely new!